Dark Humor Jokes No Limits
My favorite film is The Hunchback of Notre Dame.
I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.
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The cemetery is so overcrowded.
People are just dying to get in.
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When we were kids, we used to be afraid of the dark.
But when we grew up, the electricity bill made us afraid of the light!
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You’re not completely useless.
You can always serve as a bad example.
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Why did the old man fall in the well?
Because he couldn’t see that well.
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Why are friends a lot like snow?
If you pee on them, they disappear.
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Top 10 Best Emo Jokes
1)- What do you call an emo a capella group?
Self Harmony
2)- I started an emo salsa band0
We’re called Hispanic at the Disco
3)- What do you call a committee of emo kids?
A cutting board
4)- Why did the emo swallow an alarm clock?
So he could wake up inside.
5)- Why did the emo kid leave the bar?
It was happy hour.
6)- What do you call an emo vegetable?
A despair-agus
7)- Have you heard about the new emo pizza?
It cuts itself
8)- How do you get an emo kid out of a tree?
You cut the rope
9)- An emo and an apple fall out of a tree. Which one hits the ground first?
The apple, the emo is stopped by the rope.
10)- A leaf and an emo fall from a tree. Who hits the ground first?
The leaf. The rope stopped the emo.
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Dark Humor Funny Jokes Memes
My elderly relatives used to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”
They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
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I was sad to hear the Head of Latin at my old Catholic school died yesterday.
A mass will be said for him later today. And amo. And amat.
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What is the only phone you can give to an orphan without being insensitive?
iPhone 11 – It doesn’t have a home button.
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I really don’t understand the world anymore.
Peter (89), lost his hearing aid.
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The lady at the job center: “I can offer you 3 positions.”
Me: “That’s very nice of you but what about a job?”
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Wow, honey, I never thought our son would go that far!
Yeah, the catapult is really amazing. Go get our daughter!
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My aunt’s star sign was cancer, so it’s pretty ironic how she died.
She was eaten by a giant crab.
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What’s the difference between a police officer and a bullet?
When a bullet kills someone else, you know it’s been fired.
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Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours.
Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
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They say in every friend group there is one willing to commit murder.
I killed the guy I suspected before he could do any harm.
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Black Dark Humor Memes
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone.
It’s either terrible news or great news.
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Mother, what are the bones doing in the piranha aquarium?
Mother? Mooootttthhhheeeer!!!
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My husband is mad that I have no sense of direction.
So I packed up my stuff and right.
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Why do vampires seem sick?
They’re always coffin.
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I have a joke about trickle-down economics.
But 99 per cent of you will never get it.
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My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working.”
I’m not sure what she’s talking about.
I opened the fridge door and it’s working fine!
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I asked my mirror yesterday if there is anybody prettier than me.
The bastard is still reciting names.
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Patient: Oh doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation.
Doctor: Don’t worry. Mine too.
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Best Dark Humor Jokes About Orphans
“Whose ugly child is that?!”
“Excuse me?! That’s my daughter!”
“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know you were the father.”
“You what?! I am her mother!!”
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“My dad drives like the lightning!”
“Wow, he’s that good, yeah?”
“Well I don’t know. He drives really fast
and from time to time he hits a tree.”
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Two highlanders are talking, “Say, what would you
do if a bear suddenly started attacking your wife?”
“Why would I have to do anything?
He started it, let him defend himself!”
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Why do orphans work boomerangs?
Because it’s the only thing that comes back.
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Once I saw A girl crying and asked where are your parents;
God I love working at orphanages.
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Hi, Welcome to Dave’s Orphanage
you make them we take them how may I help you?
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What’s the difference between jelly and jam?
You can’t jelly a clown into the tiny automobile